Before you start reading this, understand that its purpose is not to point fingers, make assumptions, or make you feel bad. It is an open ended observation of possibilities about the similarities of faith and marriage and it is neither an end all solution nor permanent fix for either your marriage or your faith. I may write some more on this later, but I wanted to share my thoughts. This is certainly not an attempt to over simplify marriage or faith.
It think it’s important for you to understand that I fail in both areas of marriage and faith! I am not one of those Pastors or Marriage Guru’s that never fails in his/her own walk with Jesus or the lifetime adventure with his/her spouse. I do fail, more than I’d like, but I am thankful that I am not blinded to my failures, for as long as I can identify my shortcomings, there is HOPE.
Like any marriage, mine has been a work in progress! If you are loving your spouse and loving Jesus, hard work continues, and progress is made, which brings me to my point! Is a failing marriage an alarm of struggling faith?
There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that these two are dependants! Here are simply two ideas that I want to briefly throw at you…
The Idea of One
Anyone who has ever been to a wedding ceremony has most likely heard this, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 We hear it, but are we applying it?
Most marriages today are just like a set of railroad tracks. Each track is representative of each person in the marriage and the railroad inclusive of the tracks is the marriage. It is the perfect picture of marriages that are failing! The tracks accomplish their purpose, to move us from one location to another. The wedding, the giving of rings, the marriage does the same thing. It moves us from single to married.
But there is a monumental flaw! The tracks never cross and become one. They just run parallel with one another forever! The bible says that a marriage is supposed to merge and become one. Jesus prayed in John 17:21 “that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”
The idea of ONE is absolutely necessary for the success of your marriage and your faith! Are you continuing to live your own life the way you want on your terms in your time for your satisfaction? If you are you just don’t get it! ARE YOU A TRACK OR A MARRIAGE?
The Idea of Sacrifice
This idea really is entirely dependant upon whether you have decided to be a marriage or continue to be a track! If marriage is your choice, and I hope it is, then YOUR WILL should be non-existent! Jesus said in Hebrews 10:9-10 “Then he said, “Here I am, I have come to do your will.” He sets aside the first to establish the second. And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.”
You may ask, Why should I have to sacrifice? Because by your confessed love for your spouse you have chosen to “set aside the first to establish the second”. Jesus sacrificed is LIFE for you and in doing so he made a profound statement, “Here I am, I have come to do your will.”, not his will, but his Father’s! If Jesus was willing to die for you, why aren’t you willing to die to self! Sacrifice your needs, wants, and desires, for your spouse. Study them, Get to know them, Really find out what they like and especially DON’T LIKE, don’t get mad or ticked or frustrated when they tell you what they want, desire, and need, from you!
There is a payoff! Jesus sacrificed himself to fulfill his Father’s will, that you may have eternal life! I guarantee you, although it may take some time, your sincere sacrifice will not go unnoticed and what seems difficult and hard and painful will be overpowered by its dividends!
Is a failing marriage an alarm of struggling faith? YES! So what are you going to do about it?